| on Saturday 03 December 2005
|
Page 1 of 3
 My watching of a good TV programme the other day was rudely interupted
by an advertisement for tampons. There they were with the old blue
water 'proving' that their product was better than "the next leading
brand". I suddenly wondered if this had been tested independently,
thinking it hadn't I set to it, throwing my own homemade creations in
to the mix.
For this experiment backup was called for in the form of my good buddy, Raf.
Not being of the 'laydee' variety of human, we weren't able to test any
of these products for comfort so this series of tests is all about
absorbency, just like the adverts.
First off, the contenders:
The leading brand - Tampax
Supermarket own - Sainsbury's Applicator Tampons
Homemade - JimmerUK's Fanny Plugs (prototype)
So we set off. The test is an easy one: stick them in a glass of a
measured amount of the infamous blue water (250ml) and let them do
their business. When it is determined they can soak up no more, we pull
them out and measure how much water is left therefore determining their
absorbency.
First up - Tampax
WHOAH! The moment it touched the water it instantly grew in size! I
didn't realise how fast these things worked. You never, ever want to
try eating one of these fuckers as you will die. Remember, the human
body is 70% water and these things could drain you dry. I'm surprised
that once you open a packet of these all the water isn't sucked out of
the atmosphere!
After my surprise we got back down to science with the Sainsbury's own brand.
The Tampax and Sainsbury's both looked the same kind of size before
they were immersed, but we immediately noticed that the
Sainsbury's hadn't grown to quite the proportions of the Tampax
once wet. Could this mean that it wouldn't hold as much water? We would
soon find out.
Next up - JimmerUK's Fanny Plugs (something I'm very, very proud of)
Now, we had trouble totally immersing this bad boy. Not because it grew
to the size of a moon and enveloped us all, simply because it was
already huge in the first place.
A sturdy Raf finger was placed on the 'tampon' to hold it down. When
these hit the shelves, a plastic Raf Finger will come with the box to
enable laydees to insert the tampon a little easier. I think we might
even put his phone number on the box aswell so laydees can call for the
personal touch. How's that for customer service!
Results:
Tampax - The tampax glass was left with 213ml meaning it had absorbed 37ml.
Sainsbury's Own Brand - The SOB glass was left with 223ml, meaning it had absorbed 27ml.
JimmerUK's Fanny Plugs - The JFP glass was left with 222ml, meaning that it had absorbed 28ml.
WOO YAY! My first attempt at making a tampon with three sheets of
kitchen roll and an elastic band actually turned out to be better than
the Sainsbury's 'professional' version. I couldn't believe it.
Unfortunately both were left standing by the super-absorbency of the
Tampax. That little bastard drained over a third more fake menstrual
fluid than mine. Bah!
Having toyed enough with tampons, we turned our attentions to sanitary towels.
Click NEXT below for Sanitary towel fun.
<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 Next > End >>
|
Oh the joy, the deep deep joy...
...
By: Nipelk on Friday 31 March 2006
Those elastic bands have had postman's fingers all over them. If a girl wanted a postman's fingers up her mimsy she would ask him to wash them first.
Bear this in mind.
» Report this comment to administrator
» Reply to this comment...